Case of the X.

X~Factor

(My thoughts so far.... 2009)

The X Factor. You either have it, or, you don't. You either love it or hate it. Or don't watch. I can't believe anybody who has a television in the UK, and is able to watch the X Factor on a Saturday and Sunday not watching. Sadly, this year too many 'talented' acts were allowed to fall through the net, to be replaced by pure mediocrity... And in some cases pure and actual tone-deafness. So not good for what is ostensibly a singing contest, but descends into a 'personality' contest, often between the judges. (I often wonder how Louis Walsh got to where he is. Louis must be the only manager of 'semi~gay' but ok bands, (From Ireland) who surely suffers from tone-deafness and the "Oh feck it, shall I try and say something controversial, or shall I just say you owned that song... You made it your own")

Simon Cowell ruined the programme, over the John and Edward, or 'Jedwood' scandal (now thankfully deadwood as far as the X-Factor goes after their too late ejection) and nearly lost any credibility that the X-Factor may or may not have attained. Be honest, we all tune in to listen to Simon and his caustic, but often very accurate critiques. And sometimes the odd bit of banter between Louis and Simon. I don't think Danni Minogue adds that much. I can't really tell. Her face, especially around the eyebrow area never moves.... Someone suggested she may have had botox... Surely not?

And as for Cheryl Cole? Along with Danni. What gives them the moral right to judge singers, as neither of them are particularly good singers themselves. Particularly Cheryl. 'Fight For This Love' is quite a good track. But you don't have to exactly stretch your inconsiderable vocal talents on it do you Mrs. Cole? I remember that Danni had a couple of decentish dance tracks out years ago. Little or nothing else since. I say ditch the Dodo's. The Dodo's being Louis, Danni and Cheryl. Let Simon Cowell do EVERYTHING. Strikes me he already does everything anyway. The way he manipulated the 'Jedward' saga, was quite masterful on one hand. But, having not been forthcoming as to his real 'intentions' RE John and Edward, about making them into Superstars... (Really!) I see that Louis has dumped the talentless (but quite chirpy and chipper) Jedward now. I bet Simon is their 'Mr Seventy five percent.' Or manager as they are known. The actual contestants, even previous winners of the X~Factor seem to be not getting or didn't get a lot of money. Anyway this little piece is about this years X-Factor so not going to mention anything about the HUGE successes rather than failures of previous years (LEONA LEWIS! Doh! Said I wouldn't mention any previous contestants)

As I have decided to comment late on the X-Factor... Not going to mention anybody still not left in.

Danyl. Without doubt the best singer left in the competition. But will he win. I don't think so. He has started pulling too many faces and how can he trump the initial audition that he gave when he was phenomenal. So I predict second place to Danyl. But someone will see behind the attitude and tantrums and discover another Elton John type genius, sign him up and make lots of money out of him. (Rhydian anyone??)

Olly. Well what can you say about Olly. A cheeky chappy, with an unfeasibly stupid quiff, that never moves (watch it!! I suspect heavy use of Hairspray to stiffen the hair to cover the receding hairline) I think he is destined to go off somewhere and eat pork pies. He may get work at the 'Wheeltappers and Shunters' working mens clubs... Maybe a short stint at Butlins. I quite liked him at first. But realised when the audience were shouting his name out... "Wally! Wally! Wally!"

and he started to 'believe' in himself a little too much, that really, he is not that good. Suggest maybe a stage version of Take That's life story. Obviously with Wally or Olly as a slimmer but not as svelte Gary Barlow. (Gary can't sing that well either, but look where he is now. He can't half pen a decent tune though.. 'Never Forget' that)

And so to the best of them left in. Stacey. I fell in love with her straight away. Sounds as common as muck. Sings like an absolute angel... And not too hard on the old eyes either. Single mother, Stacey (Bonking Olly, the wally, allegedly) Should claim first place.

Is it just me though. What is it with the Ditzy act? She is forever saying... "Oh my God...." I swear, if she says it again, I may just kiss her. It is annoying though. I think the ploy (Airhead) Which I actually spotted straight away, with Stacey is a very cynical one, and isn't showing the real Stacey. She is using the Stoopid but sweet act a little too much now. It is for this reason that I fear her not winning this year.

We shall see. X-Factor Saturday ITV1. UK.

<(ovo)> xx

Rob. 6.10am.